good but hard friday, harder saturday

saturday. a day of rest. the Sabbath.

the Sabbath was designed by God to remind of us on our dependence and rest in Him.

that saturday, 1 day after Jesus died, the day He lay still and cold in a tomb, must have been unbelievably hard for His family, His friends.

they must have struggled to remember each word He spoke, like sorting through a massive jigsaw puzzle and trying to understand how they go together. and then discovering this horrible shaped piece, this crucified and dead piece, how does that fit in?

the presence of His absence must have been overwhelming.

how difficult to grieve for Him but also to be so at a loss to understand.

how hard to rest and trust, to Sabbath.

and how very much like our lives. we struggle to make sense of what happens in our lives and just like the first disciples and friends of Jesus what we need is not fuller knowledge but fuller trust.

Easter is at work in the darkness, in the grave, in what appears to be dead and hopeless. the beauty of redemption lays hidden, waiting to explode in it’s Easter glory.

The gospel message says,

"You don't live in a mechanistic world ruled by necessity;

you don't live in a random world ruled by chance;

you live in a world alive by the God of Exodus and Easter.

He will do things in you that neither you nor your friends would have supposed possible."

from Five Smooth Stones for Pastoral Work, by Eugene Peterson

some thoughts...

outside my window... it is dark and snowy. actually not so dark cause the snow makes things brighter.

i am thinking... about getting in bed and reading.

i am thankful for...a snow day today!

i am wearing... jammies. that’s a given. i am always wearing jammies if i am at home.

i am remembering...things i forgot to do.

i am going...to get my hair cut tomorrow. that raises the proverbial question: bangs or no bangs?

from the kitchen...zip. didn’t make dinner so no dishes to deal with.

i am hoping...that we don’t get more snow on saturday that would mess up michael’s flight home.

i am wondering...what to wear tomorrow.

i am noticing...how much my dog sleeps. seriously. she is a slug.

pondering these words...”Father forgive them…”

around the house...there is a lot of clutter. which i think is a sign of life. my house looks lived in and loved.

one of my favorite things...is a snowstorm! it came so quickly with dramatic impact and beauty and completely rearranged my day. thanks for the fun change God!

austin!

i am leaving tomorrow to go to austin and speak to a MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) group.

i love MOPS!

i love austin. david and i lived there when we met, fell in love and got married. great memories!

i love seeing my friend reenie and staying at her house...despite her recent rodent issues. and i am not talking mickey mouse.

i love shopping on south congress and exploring new knitting and quilting stores.

and i LOVE this:

obsessed with color

i know it's weird. i get a little fixated. on lots of stuff....

the ice from sonic...my converse tennies...silver bracelets...jason gray's song "the prodigal and the golden boy"...carl edwards...my crate & barrel yellow chair...my dog button...iphone apps...cake balls...lost...you get the idea.

oh and colors. i get obsessed with certain colors. i've had pink going on since i was 3 and i got to choose pink carpet for my bedroom(my parents were awesome!) now i have become fixated on these colors:

in case you've missed the almost non-stop coverage, these are the colors of the 2010 winter olympics. i can hardly focus on the events because my eye is just drawn to the athletes little bib things or to the ice rink wall. strange i know.

i must create something blue green. it's calling to me. and when something is calling to me like that, i pay attention. sometimes it is just because it is interesting to me and that's it. (like cake balls.) but sometimes, it is because the Lord has something to say to me in it and i want to hear from Him. that takes intentional listening. i don't want to miss what He is saying.

olympic fashion

this is hands down my favorite olympic moment of 2010.

these guys are the norwegian curling team. fantastic!

curling is awesome. you gotta love a sport that involves a little sweeper thing and a rock with a handle. it looks a like janitorial shuffleboard on ice.

and seriously, the pants are amazing. i love a sport that you can play in jammies.

LOVE IT!

Running on Full

This past month has been crazy busy. On top of my regular 3 Bible studies a week teaching schedule, I added multiple speaking engagements and retreats…I gave 8 messages in 5 days at the wackiest stretch of busyness. Add to that, the wife/mom duties, a few quilt clients, planning for fall Bible studies, support raising and an occasional shower. And then pile on Club Valentino, our 4 night staff/elder dinner theater show (which is a blast but a TON of work).

I should be morphing into the Road Runner with legs that look like a blurry wheel and I should be precariously close to a breakdown. But I am not. Why is that? Two reasons I think.

1. Wisdom…knowing what the essentials are for my survival. Here’s what I need each day:

• Jesus- time to hear from Him, tune my heart to His so my heart and my schedule becomes His not mine. My grip on my limited perspective of my life loosens and lightens when I hear from Him.

• People- connecting with those I love, David, my kids, friends, people whose path I cross.

• Creativity- just a smidge of time to doodle, sew, knit, sing, dance, to see a little beauty and celebrate Him in it!

2. Grace…God gives me freedom to say "yes" to too much or "no" to things I should say "yes" to and then He graciously forgives my goof-ups, makes beauty out of my mess and equips me to do the things He asks of me. I am overwhelmed with gratitude for His grace.

When I rest in these two things, I am at peace in the midst of a crazy busy month! (But p.s.-It is easier said than done though, for I find that I am more inclined to try too do all things through me, than to live out His grace and wisdom.)